Thursday, March 18, 2010

This qualifies as news?

Sandra Bullock has moved out and is seeking a divorce. This is news? This is Step 2. 
Step 1: marriage, or a facsimile. Step 2: divorce. That's the Hollywood formula. Why would it draw ink or capture a film frame? What a wasted culture we live in.
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Saturday, March 13, 2010

Just one minute, barkeep

It's Daylight Saving Time again.
Turning clocks back in the fall could mean another bar hour since bars tend to close at 2 a.m.
Ixnay.
Bars actually close at 1:59 a.m.
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Monday, February 22, 2010

My name for Nashville's downtown arena

Ready? The Rubber Room.

Ice hockey has the highest profile of any regular tenant at the place. And it's a wild and crazy sport. Plus, it's goodbye Sommet Center and hello Bridgestone Center.

Welcome to The Rub-berrrrr Rooooooommm.

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Monday, February 15, 2010

Dubious distinction

I've created a new word -- soaprah
Soaprah: def. An afternoon television talk show hosted by a female in the mold of Oprah Winfrey.

I want to tell my story on Oprah
My story is a real life soaprah
...

Monday, January 25, 2010

Obamacare: Oh, why can't we see

Poor dumb us.

We conservatives, if we could only see that the health care reform, let's call it Obamacare, is the answer to our needs for most of us. If only we were a little brighter. If we were, we would realize that all the things we speak against in the reform are false, that the things we feel are really important and need to be in the proposal, well, they really are in there.

If only we were not being brainwashed by conservative radio and television talk show hosts. If only Nancy, Barack and Harry could just get their message through with us really paying attention.

Here is what we know and what we always know to be true: Any time our government wants to give us something there will be strings attatched. It will not be exactly as stated. And those strings are there to keep us bound. And those strings are there to sneak in more government control in other areas. We know democrats want to control our every move.

More importantly, the vast majority knows what it smells like on the bottom, and this one doesn't pass the smell test. Never did.

Of course, there is something to be said about our lack of intelligence all the way around. Just look who we've elected.

Poor dumb us.

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Sunday, January 24, 2010

Living among the rocks makes you rock-brained

Why would bin Laden want to take claim for some adherent catching his shorts on fire in the name of Allah? Even in desperation it seems a dubious thing to take credit for.

The reason is obvious. He thinks that all such acts are distractions to our daily lives as Americans, and that makes them all victories for his cause, which is: if you are not a part of our religion then you need to be eradicated. That would almost be sinisterly noble if not for it being a wrong and thus doomed religion.

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Sunday, January 17, 2010

Obama's failings are our vestiges of hope

I keep reading and hearing about people "who want Barack Obama to fail," as if that is a putdown on Obama being black. I, for one, want Obama to fail. Because if he does not fail, then that means his liberal agenda is being railroaded through and we are on our way to becoming part of an international government. Obama is not leading our country. His goal all along has been to reshape our country, not lead it, into a socialistic network.

We want him to fail so his programs will fail with him. Yes, we want him to fail. Any real American would.

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