George Plaster, Sports Dork

Major league baseball expert Jayson Stark calls into 104.5 The Zone on Mondays to answer questions from host George Plaster.

This fact is mentioned on the radio station's website.

Stark has been around for years and his name can be seen regularly in columns he writes for newspapers and magazines.

On Monday, May 10, Plaster introduced him as "Jayson Starks."

That would be excusable if you were a welder or a car salesman.

Plaster, however, a Vanderbilt grad, is as clumsy with words as he is with sports. He often bemoans his golf game, as if that is some sort of a revelation. Once you see Plaster in a photo or on television, you put that image with his words and you know you have a klutz.

"Starks." Pathetic.

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This is one of our leaders?

Channel 2's Chris Bundgaard interviewed Tennessee Congressman Jim Cooper not long after Cooper viewed the Nashville floodage in a Blackhawk helicopter. On 2's evening news Cooper said, "It's probably one of the worst disasters in Nashville history."

Thanks, Jim. At least he didn't add, "I'll never forget it."

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Mark Howard is ready for Emma's Flowers commercial

It kills me to hear someone pronounce foyer as foy-ay. It's totally wrong and no case can be made for it. Another is pronouncing forte as for-tay. It's fort, in sound. The "e" is silent. Nobody gets that one correct.

The prize, however, for trying to sound so so erudite and failing badly goes to The Sports Zone's Mark Howard, who in a five-minute stint on an April 30 Friday morning broadcast pronounced vase as "vaz" (the third choice preference), bouquet as "boo-kay" (the second choice preference) and cravat as "kra-vot" (a non-word).

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This qualifies as news?

Sandra Bullock has moved out and is seeking a divorce. This is news? This is Step 2. 

Step 1: marriage, or a facsimile. Step 2: divorce. That's the Hollywood formula. Why would it draw ink or capture a film frame? What a wasted culture we live in.

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Just one minute, barkeep

It's Daylight Saving Time again.

Turning clocks back in the fall could mean another bar hour since bars tend to close at 2 a.m.

Ixnay.

Bars actually close at 1:59 a.m.

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My name for Nashville's downtown arena

Ready? The Rubber Room.

Ice hockey has the highest profile of any regular tenant at the place. And it's a wild and crazy sport. Plus, it's goodbye Sommet Center and hello Bridgestone Center.

Welcome to The Rub-berrrrr Rooooooommm.

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Dubious distinction

I've created a new word -- soaprah
Soaprah: def. An afternoon television talk show hosted by a female in the mold of Oprah Winfrey.

I want to tell my story on Oprah
My story is a real life soaprah
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